Sunday Confessions: 1-4-26
The worst Monday of the year as voted by… everyone. Hopefully this week’s batch makes you feel at least a little bit better.
Here they are.
The thought of going back to work this week actually makes me want to commit a federal crime.
Afraid to weigh myself because I genuinely think I’ve gained like 10+ pounds over the last two weeks. Still have a mountain of chocolate too.
The urge to throw out most of the stuff I own and start the year off fresh and minimalistic is so real.
I was crying the whole way back home from my family to my real life. It’s a five-hour train ride.
I stop shaving in winter when I’m single. I love the smooth skin but it takes so much effort.
I live in a high rise in NYC and I secretly want my hot neighbor to see me in my underwear so I’ve been wearing underwear while bringing in my delivered groceries every week.
my dad is paying for my Raya subscription and he has no idea
The Vanity Fair pictures of Karoline Leavitt scared me into finally starting a skin care routine.
I feel like I hate my coworkers more after a two week hiatus.
I pretended to my family that I had to pop out for work on Christmas Day, when really I went to hookup with an old school friend I got chatting with on an app. We always had a crush on each other at school — and it was worth the wait.
I visited my parents for two weeks over the holiday and now I’m dating a guy from my hometown that I dated 10 years ago. A real life Hallmark movie.
I peed on my in-laws guest room bed and dried the mattress with the iron. Let’s not talk about the smell.
I told my family I had to work between Christmas and New years so I could leave early and do nothing in my own house.
I cried last night because there are so many cats in the world and I can’t have all of them. Everybody should have a cat and love it with all their hearts.
This is the tightest my clothes have ever been. But it’s been holiday so I’ve just been getting high and snacking nonstop.
In the span of an hour, my body created milk to feed my newborn, I fed and rocked her to sleep, rocked my toddler to sleep and gave my husband a BJ
My favorite thing about the holidays is consuming prosecco and port wine cheese spread with reckless abandon.
I lie about having read high-brow books and pretend to have an opinion.
I want to get pregnant just for the maternity leave so I can have a nice long break from work.
My password for everything is my ex girlfriend’s name. Too lazy to change it after 5 years. My gf of 3 years found out this morning.
Haven’t worked since December 10th and probably still won’t make an effort until February.
As a DoD employee I just want to scream at the top of my lungs. But I also want to pay my bills, so I remain to complicit.
Been thinking about cutting back on weed for a while and was looking for a “signier sign”. Then recently I couldn’t remember if I was working January 2 or not. I got up, got ready, and went to work only to find a locked door. Maybe I’m ready to admit I smoke too much weed if I’m so high I can’t even remember a day off.
I mute the St. Jude commercials.
I have a callous on my pinky finger from where my phone rests and I find that deeply disturbing.
I hook up with the same guy every NYE then we don’t talk until the next. This was the best hookup yet and I’m taking it as a good omen for 2026.
My husband and I started Whole30 on 1/1 and I’ve already cheated and plan to continue to cheat for the next 30 days.
I judged straight women who are into Heated Rivalry hard but I actually watched it this weekend and it’s amazing.
I can’t wait to show off my new boobs this summer. I will be annoying about it and I do not care.
I went to the ER to get a sick note so I don’t have to go back to work tomorrow. I’m fine.
I don’t know if it’s the perimenopause or what, but honestly a couple of my girlfriends are so gorgeous that I’m starting to wonder if I’m 100% straight.
Sometimes when I need to blow off steam I blast Limp Bizkit in my car after work.
I think I got giardia from my dog’s mouth kisses….no regrets :o)
Put myself out there with two new friend groups on NYE and January 1st. Thought “what’s the worst that could happen?” and then basically lived that out.
The idea of even going back to my cubicle tomorrow makes me want to vomit, cry and scream all at once. If I have to even go through the whole “how was your holiday” or “back to the grind” comments tomorrow I may just lose my shit and walk out.
Have to fire someone at 9:00 am Monday.
Told my boss I’m travelling and have to work remotely this week. I will be at home on my couch with periodic travel to the fridge.
i bring the same delicious cookies to every holiday party i’m invited to, not to be gracious, but because i have a praise kink and all of the compliments the recipe consistently garners makes me feel literally so sexy and fabulous.
watching my friends blow lines this weekend grossed me out. i guess that’s growth?
I dropped my phone in my boyfriend’s toilet. Picked it up, gave it a thorough wipe down, carried on. I don’t know why I’d say something, but it feels weird not to.
I gave my number to a platonic same-sex coworker trying to be friendly because our work can get toxic. However now she sends messages all day long - until like 10pm at night and starts again at 7am. Send help.
