So I’ve been dating. I guess I should clarify: by that I mean I’ve gone on dates, I’ve blacked out on dates, I’ve had a date try to get with my gay best friend and handcuff himself to said best friend. The dating thing hasn’t really been going “according to plan.” It’s not that I’m upset about because to be totally honest, I don’t hate being single. In fact I kind of dig being able to do whatever I want and eat popcorn every night in nothing but a hoodie and wool socks.
But Spring and Summer are coming. And for me that means weddings, a lot of vacations, arguably more holiday parties (the 4th, Memorial Day, my birthday) than in the winter, and just kind of a variable cornucopia of events I would like to have a designated plus one for. Being single on your birthday kind of blows. Being single when we’ve rented a lake house for the weekend and almost all of my friends are coupled up and will be having vacation sex is not something I want to handle alone.
So in the spirit of copying SS I’m now taking applications for the opposite of a Hibernation Girlfriend, the Summer Fling. Contract is from May to September. Be the Danny Zuko to my Sandy Olsson. But I’m more of a “Bad Sandy” and I’d prefer you in leather to the cardigan if we’re being honest.
PS: We recognize that this is just a different version of online dating, right? So even though ya’ll give me shit for using OkCupid this is basically the same. Right? Right.